I don’t mean… Who all be an unmotivated commitment phobe say yeaaaaa!?! Rather… Anyone else consider themselves a driven individual, but find traditional goal-setting unappealing, unnecessary, or unfruitful?
I really haven’t considered the point of this post, so I’m just throwing some thoughts out there… excuse any rambling!
I’ve discovered I’m not a big dreamer. That sounds totally sad, but really I’m just an expert at living in the moment :) I usually see what I want clearly… and it never leaves my mind. Focusing that far into the future seems like wasted time, because I’m too busy figuring out practical steps to make it happen now… and I enjoy the process.
Why does one need to write dreams on a bedazzled post-it note or share on facebook? Will you really forget that you want to move to Los Angeles? Lose 50 lbs? Learn French? Make new friends? No. Not if you’re serious about it. You probably do it for the warm fuzzies (or because your boss/teacher/pastor/parent told you it was a good idea).
I’ve just always been bothered by the pressure to set goals when I know I don’t need it for motivation. The most exciting things I’ve achieved were never written down or said aloud as a statement, but they took the path of any goal and they were certainly intentional ambitions. My plans that lead to successes have always been shared once I took a few steps in its direction.
If you need time to pinpoint what you want… Hey, take a bubble bath and write in your fresh journal, but limit the dreamy phase and move to the action… or at least marry the two! Food for thought: Why do you write down and/or share your goals? Is this habit? For accountability? Because it feels like you’re already achieving something?
If going public or writing it down is a by-product of being excited or simply strategy, more power to ya! My dad has been dropping this stat at every opportunity for the last 20 years: “You know, people who write down their goals are X percent more likely to achieve them.” And (bonus!) my mom even wrote an e-book on reaching goals. So, I have been fully persuaded that it’s smart to meditate on where you want to go.
You can’t keep that stuff completely locked up inside and expect to see it grow, but for me this means acting on those thoughts in my head - doing things that get me to my final destination faster… or at my preferred pace. But I never turn it off - it’s a steady, constant direction toward my goal(s). Not like a big declaration - “Today is day 1 of blah blah blah… and I’ll start by doing X, Y, Z.” I do think there’s power in verbalizing your dreams and vision. Sharing thoughts can definitely kick it into gear… gives you momentum. I see that. But so often it’s based on feeling!
My point isn’t that this stuff is bad… in fact, I’m sure it only helps you get closer. But it seems to help a lot of people acheive a little… as opposed to finding a way to totally get there… whatever your ‘there’ is. My thinking is- Just don’t do it til you’re ready, til you know you want it enough. Time spent in that bubble bath does not have a direct correlation to how close your U-HAUL gets to your new LA life. Sometimes we trick ourselves into thinking there’s power in the goal. It’s a pattern for many… one that often doesn’t deliver what you expect… but maybe if you try starting differently it’ll end differently.
If you’ve got some efficient process for meeting goals or the ‘something is better than nothing’ mentality sits well with you, then carry on with those 2012 resolutions tomorrow! But otherwise, if you want to get big thangs poppin this year, maybe you should reevaluate your goal-setting style. Maybe trade it for more of an action step process without a big label… or maybe lose it all together. Basically, I vote we all focus on the plan over the dream and the doing over the plan.
I really do like when other people set goals… even enjoy reading them via twitter and facebook on Jan 1 :) I don’t relate to or find faith in most people’s process… but I’m inspired when people really go for it! And mostly, I love encouraging those close to me to think about their dreams/goals/vision in specifics… break it down and make it happen!
This started as a tweet and somehow turned into a bazillion thoughts… that I wish I had time to polish… hope it makes some sense.
Happy NYE :) Live in the last moments of 2011 tonight!!!!
Love this. I’m all about people actively searching for their area of awesomeness… and SO bothered seeing people waste their energy elsewhere for too long. Just hate knowing about someone’s “genius” and not seeing it (most importantly) exercised and (eventually) capitalized upon - can’t help shifting into agent mode :)
I wish everyone had grown up with that rare combo of people in their life who both encouraged them to chase down the dream that keeps them up at night …and *also* gave them accurate feedback. Ya know, those people that set you on the right track and you actually see fruit from their nudgings. Not the ones who say ”You can be whatever you want to be if you dream big enough!” — cue tragic American Idol auditions.
But really, if you suspect that you’re gifted at whatever it is… please explore every corner of it! We’re all experts at something… or maybe you haven’t discovered your awesome yet… It could be the most random, specific thing - there’s probably a market for it now. Gah! The possibilities that exist today are unreal.
I know circumstances vary, but If there’s something sitting inside your heart/brain that you’d gladly neglect sleep for… or think about more often than that guy/gal you’ve got it bad for… please do yourself a favor and write it down, say it out loud, take some step in its direction, don’t just fantasize about it! Even if it means you finally completed nursing school and your gut says you’d rock at painting nails for the rest of your life.
Okay, shutting it down… I could elaborate for days!!